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jenny_islanderI return to my read-through of On Tyranny: Twenty Lessons from the Twentieth Century by Timothy Snyder.
"Lesson 12: Make eye contact and small talk."
My first reaction was, What?
But remember, Snyder is both a historian and a pragmatist. He focuses on how tyranny really falls, not how it ought to fall. His lessons are based on extensive study of the course of tyranny.
As he explains: "It is part of being a citizen and a responsible member of society." This because, as he points out repeatedly in this little book, tyranny prospers when people begin to behave like subjects of tyranny even before it directly touches their lives. I also recall the old adage, "Begin as you mean to go on."
Continuing: "It is also a way to stay in touch with your surroundings, break down social barriers, and understand whom you should and should not trust. If we enter a culture of denunciation, you will want to know the psychological landscape of your daily life."
Of course, what constitutes appropriate "eye contact and small talk" varies by setting; I vividly recall visiting Brooklyn as a backwoods girl and being regarded with shock and suspicion by the person I nodded and said "Evening" to on my walk to the corner store. But there is a time and a place in your local culture; don't sacrifice it to fear.
Social contact can do more. Snyder has read memoirs of survivors of many Western tyrannies of the twentieth century. He says that they "all share a single tender moment...people who were living in fear of repression remembered how their neighbors treated them. A smile, a handshake, or a word of greeting--banal gestures in a normal situation--took on great significance." And when people from whom this social contact ought to be expected "looked away or crossed the street to avoid contact, fear grew."
The reason for maintaining everyday brief social contacts, he says, is ultimately fourfold. As above, it is a reminder to oneself. It is also a way to help others be less afraid even if you don't know who needs that. "If you affirm everyone, you can be sure that certain people will feel better," i.e., less helpless and alone. And, pragmatically, "In the most dangerous of times, those who escape and survive generally know people whom they can trust. Having old friends is the politics of last resort." He ends this chapter with a challenge. People may find new friends simply by inviting others to share the social contact that reinforces community. And this, he says, "is the first step toward change."
"Lesson 12: Make eye contact and small talk."
My first reaction was, What?
But remember, Snyder is both a historian and a pragmatist. He focuses on how tyranny really falls, not how it ought to fall. His lessons are based on extensive study of the course of tyranny.
As he explains: "It is part of being a citizen and a responsible member of society." This because, as he points out repeatedly in this little book, tyranny prospers when people begin to behave like subjects of tyranny even before it directly touches their lives. I also recall the old adage, "Begin as you mean to go on."
Continuing: "It is also a way to stay in touch with your surroundings, break down social barriers, and understand whom you should and should not trust. If we enter a culture of denunciation, you will want to know the psychological landscape of your daily life."
Of course, what constitutes appropriate "eye contact and small talk" varies by setting; I vividly recall visiting Brooklyn as a backwoods girl and being regarded with shock and suspicion by the person I nodded and said "Evening" to on my walk to the corner store. But there is a time and a place in your local culture; don't sacrifice it to fear.
Social contact can do more. Snyder has read memoirs of survivors of many Western tyrannies of the twentieth century. He says that they "all share a single tender moment...people who were living in fear of repression remembered how their neighbors treated them. A smile, a handshake, or a word of greeting--banal gestures in a normal situation--took on great significance." And when people from whom this social contact ought to be expected "looked away or crossed the street to avoid contact, fear grew."
The reason for maintaining everyday brief social contacts, he says, is ultimately fourfold. As above, it is a reminder to oneself. It is also a way to help others be less afraid even if you don't know who needs that. "If you affirm everyone, you can be sure that certain people will feel better," i.e., less helpless and alone. And, pragmatically, "In the most dangerous of times, those who escape and survive generally know people whom they can trust. Having old friends is the politics of last resort." He ends this chapter with a challenge. People may find new friends simply by inviting others to share the social contact that reinforces community. And this, he says, "is the first step toward change."
